Mercury is in Retrograde and Blah Blah Blah

We are all being asked to see things and speak up in ways we haven’t felt compelled to before.

As Mercury retrogrades through Virgo, the sign of healing, of analysis and organization, we’re being called to revisit the areas in our lives, and in the world, that need this specific kind of paying attention to. Sure, retrograde gets a bad rep for breaking down computers and blah blah blah, but it’s really just a time when we should all be slowing down and taking the time to reflect. How did we get to this place? Where in our lives do we need to heal? What do we need to reorganize and reanalyze in our personal world in order to make it wiser, stronger? And how do we contribute to healing the wounds of America, and of this world?

The energies are high right now, but the window is open for growth and forward thinking change. We are all being asked to see things and speak up in ways we haven’t felt compelled to before. It may shift some of our core relationships in major ways, but again, it’s all meant for growth. It’s all meant for healing.

The shadow wants to take center stage and say here I am.

Deal with me. Heal with me.

Everything that’s coming to the surface for you right now, this week and next, is all about showing you how you ultimately want to plant your flag in this life. We got that eclipse coming, so the shadow wants to be seen. The shadow wants to take center stage and say here I am. Deal with me. Heal with me.

Don’t sleepwalk through this time. Pay attention. Take this as an opportunity to change the things that aren’t working, whether they are internal or external.

The goal is to cultivate pride in the person you are now and in the dreams you have for the person you want to be tomorrow. And if you’re not feeling proud of your beliefs, your relationships, your careers, your life, then analyze that. Figure out how to heal that. Make change around that. So that you can truly be proud in those moments when you are called to take a stand and say, “This is who I am as a person. This is what I believe in. This is what I am meant to do with my life.”

I got you. But we all got to have each other.

That Capricorn Full Moon When You Can’t Avoid The Change At Hand

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I recently had a dream where I was bitten by a bat. My hubby, the Aquarius, and I were sleeping and I noticed this little bat with bright red eyes perched in the corner of the room. He looked evil, intense, and I was sorta terrified. I knew I had to get it out of the house. But when I went to try and usher it out, it flew right at me and bit my hand. I could feel the pain of its bite, and there were two pinpricks of blood. It then landed on a wall nearby and just continued to stare at me, with those bright red eyes. I asked it, “Why did you do that?” It just glared. I woke up from the dream, and curiously still felt the numbness of its bite on my hand.

I thought about how the bat is a symbol of change and rebirth for me. It has shown up in various animal card readings, and it has appeared as a spirit animal when I have done some shamanic journeying work. So I figured its return had something to do with me needing to shift and evolve. Maybe I needed to do a new shamanic journey and reach out to it. However, I didn’t.

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Weeks later, I was hiking with a good friend and fellow Aries, who’s also a fantastic reservoir of spiritual connection for me. We had been talking about all things life and love, and I brought up the bat dream to her. “I’m thinking maybe it was about me really needing to focus on making some changes in myself. And that I need to take another shamanic journey.” Just then, my friend’s mouth dropped and her eyes told me to turn around. I did and saw a jeep with a large bat symbol on its hood. I mean, literally covering half of the hood. I turned back to my friend, who still had the same look on her face. We laughed. “I guess I do need to do those things, huh?”

Later that week, I went to my hubby’s shamanic journey circle and had a wonderful meet up with my bat guide. He told me that I needed to change, and then he killed me, which I guess is pretty common in these types of meditative experiences (if you haven’t journeyed, definitely check it out!) That death was symbolic of the transition I’m currently in, from the outdated version of me into a new, more focused me. And I believe it was setting me up for this current astrological landscape.

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Today marks the Capricorn Full Moon, and it’s a doozy. It’s going to be conjunct Pluto, which means both the moon and Pluto will be in the sign of Capricorn, conjoining and amplifying each other’s energies. And together, they will oppose the Sun and Mars, who are conjunct in Cancer. So what the hell does all that mean?

Basically, it’s time to see how bat, or your own inner guide, has been trying to speak to you and nurture you toward some kind of personal shift. Full moons are all about release, so there is some area in your life that is ready for a purging. And with that connection to Pluto, it’s in a big way. This is some “My soul needs this right now” business. And your heart needs it. You’ve either been in the throes of learning how to love yourself better or have been avoiding that process altogether. Either way, it is time to commit to loving you and paying attention to what you need. Your life is offering you signs to help mark the path, but are you paying attention?

Gone are the days of just standing back and waiting for permission to move forward or for someone to come along and hand the answer to you.

You are the answer.

The Mars/Sun component is also lending you a sense of urgency, like “I need to figure this out now.” And well, you do. Gone are the days of just standing back and waiting for permission to move forward or for someone to come along and hand the answer to you. You are the answer. Spirit is here to help in the form of meditations, dreams, and omens. So if you’ve ever dabbled in having a connection to spirit, now’s the time to commit, in whatever way works for you. Take you and the things that interest you much more seriously. No one else is going to do so until you do the same. And you deserve to feel purposeful with your life.

Jupiter is also finally moving forward, bringing some movement to areas of our lives that may have felt a little slow to get going. But don’t worry if things aren’t manifesting right away, even when you’re focusing your energy toward the things you’re supposed to be doing. As Lana Del Rey sings, “It’s enough just to make you go crazy.” And it is, but try to be like a Lana song and take it slow. Trust that the momentum is building because you are working toward building the thing that feels authentic to you.

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Most importantly, take care of yourself. We are in Cancer season, so you got to love you. You got to enjoy life and not beat yourself up for it. You got to feel all the feels and be okay with it. Take a bath. Enjoy a walk in nature near water. Play your favorite jams and sing along. Be a lady who lunches. Life is what you make it, so make it gorgeous and fun.

Remember, you create the shift and change in your life. Sometimes, you may need a bat to come along and bite you, just to stun you into seeing that you’re veering slightly off task. But the bat, or the change it represents, isn’t there to hurt you. Change is there to push you toward expansion and growth on some level. So utilize this full moon to help you release the deep emotional intensity that has been building up inside of you so that you can fully transform and move forward as your most full, inner-loving self.

That Gemini New Moon When You Got Real With Yourself

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We have to get down to releasing our self-made soap operas so that we can focus on the lives we want to be living for ourselves

I recently got over a conflict I was having with a friend, except the friend wasn’t entirely aware that there was even a conflict at all. Yes, that reveals me to be somewhat of a passive-aggressive headcase. I can admit to that. But there was also real hurt and sadness there, and I had constructed all kinds of reasons why I shouldn’t directly confront the problem. Some of it I even construed as being considerate on my part. But of course, it was all just fear-based. And in hindsight, I think some of the drama I was creating in my head, and in my relationship, was just stifled creativity withheld by resistance.

In his masterful book, THE WAR OF ART, Steven Pressfield writes, “Creating soap opera in our lives is a form of resistance.” And resistance is what keeps us from living “the unlived life within us.” We can so easily get caught up in what he’s doing or what she said or how so-and-so and so-and-so did such-and-such together and they must not care about me, but in the end, it’s almost always just some bullshit that doesn’t need to affect us. As Pressfield suggests, we have to get down to releasing our self-made soap operas so that we can focus on the lives we want to be living for ourselves.

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This Gemini new moon wants you to get real with both the person you are inside and the person you’re expressing out into the world

The Gemini New Moon is all about unifying the conversations that our heart selves and our personality selves are having, so that we can clear a path for a more authentic expression of being. Sometimes we just feel some kind of way about something, but we don’t express it. We internalize it, like I did with my friend, causing a split in our life continuum. We resist the urge to speak our truth, thus leaving ourselves to suffer in silence. And it’s usually for no good reason. So this Gemini new moon wants you to get real with both the person you are inside and the person you’re expressing out into the world. Can you see if there’s any disconnect there? Are you suppressing a part or parts of yourself in some area of your life just to keep the peace? Is there a hole in your heart that you’ve been resisting to fill?

Remember, this is the launch of a new month-long cycle. So let’s take a closer look at each sign and how to work with it.

Continue reading “That Gemini New Moon When You Got Real With Yourself”

That Aries New Moon That Lit the Flame

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That Aries new moon is in such effect, I just had to light the candles and get into some ritual with it. Aries is fire. The entire sky is either in a fire planet or being ruled by one right now. So we all must allow our lives to be a little bit on fire right now too.

Ignite the fire of passion within you for a greater inspiration in your life. The world may be crazy right now but you have the opportunity to find a quiet calm within the blowing winds around you. Whether your greatest challenges have been in love, career, communication, or personal well-being, you can light a new path for yourself. You just have to put your personal power into it – there is no time for sitting back and waiting for someone to come along and guide you.

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Your personal power is only challenged if you try to bring all of your past baggage along with you into this next chapter. Kick it all to the curb and move into tomorrow without being held back by past beliefs and ways of being. That shit is tired. And that’s why you’ve been tired. So stop carrying around the excess weight and dive into your dreams. Remember, you can only live your dreams when you stop relating to them as fantasy.

Love yourself enough now to know that you deserve to live your best, truest existence.

What are you waiting for?

That Cancer Full Moon When You Were in All Your Glory

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It’s time to feel. All of it.

The Cancer full moon is always my favorite. Full disclosure, my own moon is in Cancer so it always feels like I’m dialing in on some profound emotional experience or revelation on these days. Thank God I scheduled therapy for today. But I also love it because Cancer rules the moon, so it also marks her yearly moment to allow us all a collective emotional exhale. We may all be feeling a little emotionally constipated right now, stopped up from all the feelings we’ve had to confront and absorb over these last six months. Hell, these last two months have been enough of a roller coaster to last me a lifetime. But consider that whatever emotional process we initiated in July is now coming to a head and it wants to explode or release. Now it’s not entirely in the, “I need to scream at someone and have a breakdown” kind of way though it could be. I would just say that if we’ve been looking within and trying to cultivate some stronger relationship with ourselves around an area of our lives, now is the perfect time to move it all out of the head and into our hearts. It’s time to feel. All of it.

We should use this moment as an opportunity to love ourselves wholly. We must drop the bullshit mental games we play with ourselves and fall madly in love with the life we want to build. It’s not okay anymore to make excuses nor succumb to our own internal negative speak. Now this is all easier said than done. I know that I can meditate all day long and then come out of it to an immediate self-criticism. And that quick switch from “love and light” to “girl, your eyes look tired” is rough because then it makes the meditation feel like a failure. But it’s not. It’s just human. However, the goal is to minimize the feeling we take from the critical voice. Because THAT IS ALL IT IS. It’s not a real voice. It’s a voice conjured by past insecurities that we tell ourselves is the voice of reality. But the voice of reality is actually all around you. The voice of reality is simply the present moment.

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The time has come for you to believe in the future self that you deep down know exists in the space laid out for you

The goal is to navigate the pitfalls of the inner voices so that we come out of our days feeling gratitude and self-love. We cannot attach to the inner saboteur anymore. (By the way, if you don’t have this voice then you’ve succeeded at life and can just stop reading now.) When we do attach to that voice, we put a roadblock up in front of our abundance. We cannot see the opportunities coming our way. We cannot trust the voice of inspiration because we think it is the same voice of self-doubt. But these two do not come from the same place. Inspiration is fleeting while self-doubt will stick around. Inspiration comes in like a whisper from a dream while self-doubt nags like a roommate we can’t get rid of. Well, right now, inspiration, luck, abundance, and insight are available to us. We just have to feel with our whole mind, body, and soul that we deserve it to access it.

You deserve goodness. Can you truly believe that for yourself? I need you to feel that with your whole heart. Look in the mirror and tell that scared, loving being that is you, “I deserve goodness.” Do that for me. Do that for yourself. The time has come for a profound shift in your being, both emotional and spiritual. The time has come for you to believe in the future self that you deep down know exists in the space laid out for you. The time has come to get it together. Have faith that the goals and aspirations that you FEEL are true and can manifest if you can LOVE yourself like you never have before. Drop the shitty habits. Drop the shitty friends. Drop the shitty things you tell yourself over and over without even realizing you’re doing it. You have love in the world. And that full moon in Cancer is here, to illuminate it for you in all its glory. Be you in all your glory.

That Mercury Retrograde When You Decided Not to Be a Hot Mess

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A Mercury retrograde time can bring chaos into one’s life, but it’s ultimately here to show you a different path to action

Today marks the start of another Mercury Retrograde period (until January 8th). Go ahead. Cheer now! What this means is that for the few next weeks, your greatest hot mess of a friend (and I’ve totally been him before) will be blaming it for every tardy meeting, every missed text, and every unreturned phone call. Sure, that technologically challenged shit will go down, especially for my Scorpio friends, but we can’t let what Mercury in retrograde traditionally represents rule all of our communication misgivings. In fact, we must take this time to hold up, slow our rolls, and take stock of the bigger picture we currently have for our lives. We must get real about whether everything we are doing is helping to manifest our greatest future goals.

Mercury is going retrograde in the sign of Capricorn, which is very concerned with the big picture for our lives and all the hard work that goes into achieving it. We all know that nothing is handed to us. Even for the overnight success, years were spent toiling away in the workshop, at a desk, in the studio, or at school. So when Mercury, the planet engaged in all things communication, halts itself for the retrograde, room should be made for a re-evaluation of one’s goals and what is being done to manifest them.

We should first narrow in on the specific area in life that keeps you up at night: career, a relationship, a health goal, or one’s view on spirituality. Then, if you’re hitting a wall of any kind, stop trying to PUSH forward and reconsider the path. Are you actually doing everything you could be doing to move ahead/break through or just going through some motions? Do you need to let go of something (a person, place, thing, or mentality) in a more profound way so that you can truly activate your next personal phase? The great thing is, you can stop looking around and blaming “xyz” for your problems. With some inward evaluation, you will see what is potentially keeping your goals at bay.

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Without a doubt, these next six weeks can be extremely transformative for all of us. With Pluto, the planet in charge of deep soul shifts, touching on this current Mercury phase, know that you’ll have a more focused understanding of your current intentions and goals by the end of January. But you have to be in the process of figuring your shit out. You can’t just get caught up in the day to day. This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t get a break in. In fact, you need one. I need one. I’ll be on a beach soon with a book in one hand and a cocktail in another. Yes, the start of this six-week process must include some legit down time. In numerology terms, we are at the end of a ‘9’ year, thus the ending of a major cycle. It’s a back to 1 moment. And with any conclusion to a great life period, we should get in a good ass nap. That’s part of the process too. But then, once revived, you must make time for a rethinking and reworking of those pieces in life that just aren’t taking shape.

It’s important to know that your problems aren’t all in your head and you aren’t the entire reason that you can’t see or think straight. The world is really fucked up right now. Cities are being ravaged without thought for humanity. Women’s rights are coming under fire in various U.S. states. LGBT individuals are continuing to feel like secondary humans to the rest of society. Governments are recalibrating to assert more power in the war for who has the biggest cock. And there is so much else with race and the environment and civil unrest and on and on. It’s disheartening and disillusioning and some of us are struggling to make sense of it – to find our footing.

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Take these next few weeks to better understand where in this world you want to make a difference

One only needs to look to these current times to see the lesson in this Mercury retrograde phase. Pause and reflect on the ways that you can be more of a citizen for the world you believe in. You must figure out how to take your personal unease and alchemize it into something of use. Perhaps you are already in that process. But don’t feel a complete loss if you’re feeling powerless. You’ve only just begun to understand your power and your community is just figuring out how to come together. So time will allow you to gather your resources and rally your ideas into fruition. Take these next few weeks to better understand where in the world you want to make a difference and how. A large part of that answer  will be found by getting a greater understanding of yourself.

A Mercury retrograde time can bring chaos into one’s life, but it’s ultimately here to show you a different path to action. Are you going to get swirled up into life’s drama or will you choose this time to react differently? Can you keep on playing the victim to external circumstances or take pause to consider healthy ways to be a worthy agent of change? Will you allow yourself a clear mind or one filled with to-do lists and regrets and worries? If that email won’t send or your phone won’t make outgoing calls, will you build yourself up into a frustrated mess or just put the damn thing down and try to enjoy a phone-free afternoon of relaxation and contemplation? Right now, I say go for the latter on all counts. Your life will ultimately be more in tune, you’ll feel more purposeful, and you won’t be someone else’s hot mess of a friend when the next retrograde rolls around in the Spring.

That Gemini Full Moon When You Got Out of Your Head And Into Your Life

 

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You are the Sun to your life, the greatest life-giving star to everything that creates your own personal Universe

I’ve recently come to the realization that I tend to put myself last, meaning that what I want always gets put behind what I believe other people want of me. I have trained myself to say, “Well let me handle what that other person needs from me since my thing can wait.” What that kind of thinking has fostered is a lifetime of waiting for myself to show up, well, for myself. I’ve constantly shown up for others out of fear of them hating me or being angry at me or not liking me. It’s all the business that comes along with wanting to be loved and accepted. But now, I’ve burst through to a place where I can see that I need to be the center of my world, and everyone else and their needs can orbit around me. Now this isn’t to say that I haven’t been selfish in the past. I have made choices where I had to put myself first. But in hindsight, those choices were made from a place of survival and not self-love. I wasn’t ever really running toward anything but more so running away. And this placed all of my dreams in a pile, one I would be back later to clean up. Thankfully, later is now. Better now than never.

The Gemini Full Moon time creates the space for us all to bring our inner hopes, needs, and questions to the surface so that we can take action on them. We have the opportunity to face whatever internal dialogue of self-doubt versus self-worth it is that we contend with and move through it. We can elevate ourselves from a one-dimensional to a multi-dimensional view of ourselves. We should take this time to grab those dreams, those visionary ideas for our lives that we haven’t given enough validity to and push them into some form of existence. This may be a necessary shift in a relationship or family, or perhaps a conversation that needs to happen around career. Maybe there’s a project that needs to begin or a new field of study that needs attention paid to. Whatever it is that you know in your heart and mind is the thing that will help you connect to your loved self, take some action toward it now.

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You must take stock of your life and see where your own inner conversation has led you. How are you keeping yourself small? Who have you been waiting for to give you permission that you can be who you want to be? You must move into a state of self-being and self-worth where you can feel enabled to accomplish the goals that you believe you could achieve once upon a dream. You have that opportunity. You just need to take responsibility for your growth and accept the abundance that is available to you. Sure, it may look like a terrible road to cross full of challenge and upheaval. But no great race was ever rewarded for not leaving the starting gate.

The key right now is to NOT go it alone. It’s so easy to stay inside the bubble of yourself and toil through your troubles there. You don’t want to seem weak to others. You don’t want friends to think you’re crazy or unhappy. You don’t want anyone to know you feel alone. But making yourself vulnerable to others is the fastest way to understand that you are not alone. And this Gemini Full Moon time wants you to connect with someone other than the critical voice in your head. Jupiter in Libra and Mars in Aquarius are around too, urging you to reach out and give yourself over to others, insecurities and all. Make yourself available to others. Ask for their insight. Gather advice on an issue. Allow their encouragement to enter into your being, to remind you that you are the Sun to your life, the greatest life-giving star to everything that creates your own personal Universe. So you deserve to do all that you feel encouraged and called to do. Yes, this process will make you feel like you have some growing up to do. But you do. We all do, no matter our age or experience. That is called living. So get to it. I’m here for you.