That Aries Full Moon When You Really Grew Up

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We have been motivated to leave behind old ways of being and to step into a more “grown-up” version of the person we want to be

I was talking to a friend last night, and we were discussing how both us and some of our friends are all feeling in a very similar place right now. It’s as if we’ve come through a larger cycle of transformation and change and we’re ready to “leave school for the real world.” In thinking about it, I realized that, collectively, we have done just that. For the last three years, Saturn has been moving through Scorpio. This three-year period has pushed us to face some of our weaknesses and our fears. It has asked us to move beyond our comfort zone and to try on new aspects of ourselves. We have been motivated to leave behind old ways of being and to step into a more “grown-up” version of the person we want to be. It has not been easy, and it may have left some of us in a place of “What the fuck do I do now?” But know that you’ve moved away from some relationships, work situations, home environments, etc, that just weren’t serving you. And as rough as it has been, it has also been rewarding. And you should feel much more in your power than the you who lived in your life three years ago.

Thankfully, the Aries Full Moon is here to help us culminate this process so that we can charge forth into the next horizon. It wants you to take your first major step into the newness of your current, more “grown-up” life. It’s time to take major advantage of the shift that your life has been creating for you. Take ownership of the positive changes you are instilling into your life. You know that leaving your job or committing to your new man was a challenge to undertake, but how strongly are you taking the reins in writing this next chapter? It’s time to seal the deal and just be the damn change already. Feel connected to your instincts and trust that inner voice to guide you properly. Whatever it is you’re trying to manifest, you have it in you to do so. You just have be the guide. No one else is gonna come along with a map and escort you to some gold. You are the map. Just be present enough to the flow of your life to follow it.

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I don’t need to take months to accomplish something when I have today

I know this to be true. Three years ago, I was in a job that felt meaningless to me. I knew it had to change but I didn’t know what the change was going to look like. As soon as I took ownership of the change that needed to occur, life took over. It wasn’t always easy but it was rewarding. And now I step into this next phase with that same sense of belief and excitement. But I also know that I can’t sleep on it. I don’t need to take months to accomplish something when I have today. I was lucky enough to jump into the moving waters before so that I could flow into profound opportunities and glorious personal growth experiences. But now, I must stay present so to navigate the rocks and waves ahead. I must stay present to my journey or else it will overcome me and I will be left, washed up on shore, waiting for another wave to catch me. I must stay present because there is no alternative. And you know this.

And now some further words on each sign:

Continue reading “That Aries Full Moon When You Really Grew Up”

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Truth Is The New Black

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Get to a place where you can say “That’s the real me” and love it.

I just finished watching the second season of Orange is the New Black. It’s an amazing, brilliant television series, and these thirteen episodes gave me all of my life and some even for my next life. If you know it, then you know. If you don’t it’s a Netflix series about women in prison. It delves deeply into their emotional lives and offers fresh, real characters that are relatable and insane. In one scene, a character is assured by someone on the outside that they still remember the person she was before prison. That is how they will remember her and they know that the person she is in prison isn’t the real her. Without pause, she stares them back and disagrees. “That is the real me.” In that moment, she accepts her truth. But is she happy with it?

Cut to me these past few weeks (and forgive me for being absent from writing, but life has gotten hold!), and I am scheduled to death, dealing with an outbreak of shingles, and helping to nurse an ailing boyfriend and dog. Last night, I get home from work and suddenly have this pain in my left eye. What the fuck? I wake up and it’s still there. I look at the eye and it looks fine. Maybe it’s tension or sinus issues. But after some time and a more careful inspection, I see that I have a sty under my bottom eyelid. Again I say, what the fuck? So I try to take it easy. I get a massage. I do some warm compresses. But I know that there’s some business here for me to learn. My body is trying to wake me up. And has been – hello, shingles! So I go to my trusty Louise Hay book to look up the spiritual meaning behind an eye issue.

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I am mostly angry because I know that everything I am angry about is bullshit

In “Heal Your Body”, Louise says that I “am looking at life through angry eyes.” What Louise? You don’t know me. I am not an angry person. Okay? What does she know? I then look at myself in the mirror, at my sty. And I nod. I am angry. I am angry that everything feels like a struggle. I am angry that I don’t have more money. I am angry that I don’t make enough time for my creativity. I am angry that everybody else seems to have something good going in their lives but me. And I am mostly angry because I know that everything I am angry about is bullshit. That I can’t compare. That I can’t complain. I can be angry. It’s valid. But I can’t see the world through angry eyes or else I’m just casting shade on it all. And thus I am not seeing life clearly. Now don’t get me wrong, I love to throw shade in the right company. But it ain’t a way to build a life. And it certainly can’t be my truth. However, right now, it is. So what to do about it? What does one do when they accept their truth but see that it needs changing?

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Use this full moon energy to reconnect to that authentic essence of you

The Full Moon in Sagittarius is here to get us back in touch with our personal truth so that we can cast off anything that has been obstructing our view of the unique life we are meant to be living. Sure, there may be people in our lives who are causing us strife and slowing things down. Or they are just teaching us some valuable lessons that are forcing us to take on responsibilities and grow up in ways we hadn’t planned on. And these responsibilities may feel like they hinder us from doing the things we want to be doing for ourselves. But that doesn’t mean we have to forget who we truly are deep down. That day job doesn’t have to kill the dream you. And if the day job is in alignment with the dream you, then check if it’s somehow overwhelming the love or home or creative life you want but don’t seem to have time for anymore. Make the time. Use this full moon energy to reconnect to that authentic essence of you and remind yourself of the truth of you. Don’t let go. Don’t give up. Don’t see the world through angry eyes. Get to a place where you can say “That’s the real me” and love it.

Here’s a closer look at the signs and what it means for you:

Continue reading “Truth Is The New Black”

That Full Moon When You Dared to be Different

Embrace your uniqueness to a point that you feel uncomfortable

I was very excited and overwhelmed when I found out that we are having two Aquarius full moons this year.  It’s not usual to have two full moons in the same sign in one year.  But occasionally, the world turns in a way that allows us to catch one at the very beginning and one at the very ending of a sign.  Being that I have a number of Aquarius’s in my life, including my mother and the man who I share my life with, I am pretty familiar with their energy.  It’s quirky, out-of-the-box, inventive, and a bit unpredictable.  In total, this can all translate to being rather exciting or extremely tiring.  Thus, the next month or so will be a bit of both.  I know, we’re all pretty exhausted from Mercury’s little stint in retrograde.  However, this will be a good kind of exhaustion.  It’s the kind of exhaustion that will stem from personal productivity toward an important goal rather than just sheer mental worry and confusion, which is something I’m sure all of us could use a break from right now.  Especially when that worry is built from trying to please everyone around us.

It’s interesting how much stock we all can put into how others perceive us.  We will all make important decisions for our lives based off of what we think other people will think of our choices.  Now that is some tiring shit.  I mean you’re already worrying about what you want.  Then, add the concern of what you think other people will think about what you want, and you’re totally wiped out from the stress of worrying about you and everyone else.  Well, Aquarius doesn’t have time for worry.  It wants you to embrace your uniqueness to a point that you feel uncomfortable.  That way, the thought of how others perceive you will vanish from the equation.  Aquarius simply thrives on being completely different from everyone else.  So with these two full moons, the rest of this summer is all about the need to own that special something we each possess inside.

Give over to the wave of your own crazy sexy coolness

You have to be okay with showing people who you really are.  Some may be shocked by how verbally passionate you seem to suddenly be about an issue or project.  Or they may wonder why you’re now deciding to go back to school or take up a seemingly odd hobby.  But the great thing is that you have no reason to care about what they think.  You are the only one on the path of your internal compass.  You are the only one who has to stand accountable to yourself at the end of the day.  And you are the only one who is in charge of your personal happiness.  So stand in your power and give over to the wave of your own crazy sexy coolness.  If you can, it will wash away the bullshit layer you have allowed others to place on your mind, your heart, and your life.  And from there, you can start the process of coming clean.

So know that this is a two-parter.  Again, we have another Aquarius full moon next month, so you have a lot to release around one aspect of yourself.  So start gently and prepare to get real.  Let’s take a closer look at how all this could work for you:

Continue reading “That Full Moon When You Dared to be Different”

One Man’s Pain is Another Man’s Retrograde

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Shit’s gonna go down when you least expect it

For the past few months now, I have been unhappy in my day job.  It had just ceased being challenging and creative in the way I needed it to be.  And I had been talking to friends about my “next steps” while mentally laboring over the things I needed to be doing in order to achieve the real professional success I was looking for in my life.  Yeah, lots of words.  Lots of me, talking.  Therefore, I wasn’t making much tangible progress.  In particular, these last few weeks saw me making light attempts to flesh out some of my creative projects, but the work always found itself overshadowed by my inner chatter – a white noise wall of questions.  Am I really meant to be a writer?  How should I go about bringing it into my life?  What is this astrology thing about for me?  Is it a legitimate path?  How can I find clarity when I have to report daily to a job that leaves me passionless?

Then, life offered me a nudge – I was abruptly laid off from my job.  In a way, it wasn’t sudden.  I had the feeling that I needed to move along.  I just thought that perhaps I would be a bit more in the driver’s seat.  However, when Saturn, the planet of structure, is hovering over Uranus, the ruler of sudden surprise, and it’s going on in your chart’s 6th House, the place that rules your daily work routine, shit’s gonna go down when you least expect it.  And how you least expect it.  But I haven’t responded in a way that most would in this situation.  In fact, I have surprised myself with how positive I am seeing the whole thing.

I am choosing to utilize this moment as a call to order

I know that this is a gift of retrograde.  The universe is urging me to review how I want to spend my days and reinterpret my daily routine to fit that ideal.  All I can see here is opportunity.  Sure, there is some fear and imminent limitation in the situation, which are all things Saturn, but I am choosing to utilize this moment as a call to order.  And, in a way, it’s a chance to reboot my life.  That is the exact gift of a retrograde for each and every one of us – a do-over.

We need to make sure that we’re asking the necessary questions

Everyone is going through some major questioning right now.  Not only are Mercury and Saturn in retrograde, but we also have five planets and the celestial cousin Chiron all moving through the sign of Pisces.  That means we are either getting deeply in touch with our inner selves or we are feeling so confused that we just can’t drink three glasses of wine fast enough.  And coupled with the retrograde energy, we’re second-guessing our ideas and goals.  Are we sure that we know what we’re doing?  The good thing is, we don’t need to have the answers right away.  We just need to make sure that we’re asking the necessary questions.  That way, we can then open ourselves up to receiving all of the important information that is going to help us understand where we need to go next in life.

Let’s take a closer look at how all of these planetary influences are affecting each sign:

Continue reading “One Man’s Pain is Another Man’s Retrograde”

OLD HABITS DIE NOW

Anxiety found its way to me at a very early age.

I have no idea when I started biting my nails.  I must have been around 7 or 8 when my dad would yell at me from the couch as I sat four feet away from the TV set, just gnawing on my hand.  It sounds like anxiety found its way to me at a very early age.  Chewing my nails was a way to deal with the pent up energy.  And it still is, I guess.  What can I say: I have a lot of spirit running through me at all times.

Today as I was driving on a grocery run, I started to bite my nail.  I immediately became present with what I was doing and pulled my hand away.  As I continued to drive, it dawned on me that I have been partaking in this particular bad habit for almost thirty years.  Thirty years of behavior that my young child self started while mindlessly staring at The Cosby Show.  And here I am.  A grown ass man, still mindless.  So what the hell has kept me stuck in this juvenile routine for so many years?  I think it’s probably a product of my fearful upbringing, coupled with a problem relaxing.  But it ain’t doing me any good now.

We must free ourselves from the habits that keep us from actualizing our best selves. 

You may think that a habit like nail biting isn’t a big deal.  Gross, yes.  But is it destructive?  On the surface, no.  But in truth, when it comes to certain stressful situations, I am still that scared, nervous little boy.  And in my adult life, when dealing in business or with a client, people don’t want to see some scared little boy in front of them.  They want to see a confident, capable man.  And that is who I want to be.  But holding onto some childish activity just lets me keep one foot in the doorway to adolescence, and that’s a problem.  Because then I am not fully taking responsibility for the present moment, and I am ultimately expressing fear about being a fully realized adult.  I’m keeping myself from truly living as me.

Well, it’s time to let go.

This week’s full moon in Taurus wants you to get real.

We all have our vices, addictions, and areas of life where bad decision-making reigns, but the planets currently have a grander plan in mind for the sum of us.  We must free ourselves from the habits that keep us from actualizing our best selves.  This week’s full moon in Taurus wants you to get real and see that by holding onto a habit, you’re not giving yourself the complete commitment you deserve.  More so, it wants you to get to the root of your apprehension to going all in on yourself.  In order to be the greatest expression of yourself, you have to be dedicated to the dream you have for your life.  It is when you strive for that dream that you activate the scenarios and relationships that will take you to the next level of your existence.

So what nasty habits are keeping you from making that ultimate commitment – the one that would have you dazzling at the change you’ve made for your life?  Look at your life and choose one habit that is keeping you from actualizing the next, best version of you.  Now, that is not to say that the ‘you’ now isn’t good enough.  But the ‘you’ now probably isn’t taking full advantage of the gifts you have nor is it fulfilling the true purpose you see for yourself.  So look deep and see where in your life you could stand to let go of an old way of being.

Here’s some further help, in case you need it.

Continue reading “OLD HABITS DIE NOW”

Are You Walking with a Ghost?

Are you going to recognize the change and live it, or will you be a ghost in your own life?

Recently, I was at the gym, working on my fitness and pondering the various questions of my life.  I was thinking about work, about my health, and about my need to make some important mentality shifts.  I had already been in the headspace of change, as I had been thinking about Pluto and Saturn and the recent moves they had each made.  And given that these planets are all about transformation in our lives, I knew that I was in the midst of metamorphosis.  So as I finished up my tricep pushdowns and moved over to a back machine, all of my mental lingering led me to a sudden thought that I was compelled to jot down.  I quickly pulled out my phone and used my ‘Notes’ feature to write out the following:

“It’s time to commit to the transformation.  There is no turning back.  Turning back doesn’t even equal death because the death has already occurred.  The change is in place.  Are you going to recognize the change and live it, or will you be a ghost in your own life?”

I was immediately struck by the idea of being “a ghost in your own life”.  I thought of how so many of us refuse to meet a change, or death, in life.  Whether it’s the end of a relationship or the loss of a loved one or even growing up into an adult, we can all find it hard to let go and move on at times.  But still, life moves on without us.  Yet we remain stuck in our outdated beliefs and mentalities.  And like ghosts, we wander through our present day lives responding from a place, a feeling, of the past.  The pain of long ago haunts our current relationships and work lives, making for weighted, poor decision making.  And then we wonder why we’re unhappy.  Why things won’t change and get better.  Well, until we realize that we are producing our current reality from a place of pain – one that has been festering in our psyches for far too long – we won’t be able to fully and cleanly move into the next chapter of our lives.  And right now, we are all feeling the ache to manifest change in a major way.  That’s because Saturn is knocking at our door and Pluto is rumbling under our feet.

As Rupaul says, “The time has come for you to lip-sync.  For your life.”  So let’s get to it.

What does this new phase bring for you?

Continue reading “Are You Walking with a Ghost?”