Just see the new you emerging and dive into the wave of it
My plan this morning was to wake up early and channel the Scorpio new moon’s energy to write one of my usual posts on it. However, Uranus, the ruler of surprise, was directly involved in my personal new moon and where it fell in my chart, so it brought on an unexpected turn of events. I awoke to some messages that a relative had gone into the hospital and was not doing very well. After speaking to my parents, it was revealed that he would probably not make it for much longer. Though not incredibly close to him, I knew it was important for me to go and be with my family. Thus my afternoon of writing turned into a day in the hospital, feeling grief and sadness. In a way, it was actually an experience suited to the Scorpio new moon as it was literally about the sign’s greatest marker. Death. But it also allowed me to spend some very intimate time with the people I love most dearly in life, and to see the other important element of Scorpio. Rebirth.
My family and I are not the same people we were a decade or two ago. Once divided by pain, anger, and addiction, we have since transformed into a clan that now puts love first. Sure, we still have some collective healing to do, but we have truly evolved in a remarkably positive way. However, our family’s rebirth hasn’t kept me from still reacting to them from those old feelings of pain or anger. At times, it would be like the twelve year old me was in the room again, feeling all of the same emotions that tore him up inside so many years ago. And then I would be frustrated at myself for still holding onto the past in such an emotional way. It was a vicious cycle.
Today though, I saw that I was able to engage them without feeling any of the old childhood crap at my feet. The young me wasn’t even in the room. Instead, today I was just present as the man I am now. I guess you could say that seeing another man at death’s door will force you into the moment. I have also been experiencing a pretty powerful inner shift leading up to today. The old elements of me that no longer belong have been seriously put on trial as of late. And I think today’s experience helped them to get their final sentencing. I also know I’m not the only one feeling this inner urge to shift and evolve.