The Aries New Moon of 2018

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Give over to your uniqueness

I recently received an astrology chart reading from one of my faves, Anne Ortelee. She spoke to me about needing to be more comfortable and confident in expressing more than just one side of myself and my work. Being someone who works in film but also as an astrologer has always felt tricky. Like in some way I had to disassociate the two. And for the most part, I’ve gotten good at compartmentalizing them. But in thinking more on what Anne said, it does me such a disservice to own only parts of me at certain times. Sure, it can be a challenge to tell some agent that I can read his or her chart and have done so for many. But some get their lives from that reveal and immediately want to tell me their birthday. It’s the others whose eyes glaze over that make me feel like I should’ve just kept my mouth shut so as to avoid their judgement. But let’s face it, their judgement is just my own internal judgement reflected back at me. And if I’ve learned anything in the last year, authenticity is what’s most needed and seen right now. So how do I just own all of me, all of the time, without any sort of internal question marks or side eye?

The Aries New Moon is now upon us, and I always see it as an astrological new year of sorts, but for our internal selves. As most of you know, a new moon in general is all about a merging with our inner and outer states, so it becomes a chance for us to reboot the connection between the two. This new moon is the first one after we’ve transitioned into Spring, when everything begins to awaken from its winter hibernation to start anew. Aries is a time of beginnings, when we can find ourselves initiating new cycles, projects, and relationships with ourselves and others. It can inspire us to be creative and passionate in our approach, though sometimes that can overflow and cause us to be compelled by any compounded aggression that we’ve stashed within. So, we’ve got to be ultra-aware right now. Aries will jumpstart us in ways that can be purposeful, but that is only if we choose to engage with it as such. Otherwise, it will just ignite an out of control fire.

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An Aries new moon is like a new round in a video game. You’ve lost a life but there’s another in the queue.

The sun and moon in Aries also sit in conjunction with Uranus, the planet of chaos and rebellion. With these three in the sign of war (Aries), it makes sense that on a global scale, we are diving into that kind of energy. But on a personal level, how you take action in your life right now can lead you toward some serious growth and change. Will you take on the challenge or just tell yourself that “it is what it is”? In a way, our astrological charts show us how the obstacle course of our lives have been set up, but we then have to choose how to play in it. We can surmount the walls around us, or we can see them as barriers that we just have to accept. An Aries new moon is like a new round in a video game. You’ve lost a life but there’s another in the queue. You get to start over, this time taking with you all of the knowledge that you attained in your last go around.

Uranus is also the planet that shows us where our authenticity sits. For us to have it as part of this new moon equation means that, in some way, our life is trying to show us a clearer picture of our authentic self so that we’ll more fully embrace it. For some, it’s facing that part of us that we’ve been at war with and have been trying to hide or suppress, while for others, it’s just an amplification of the self we’ve grown accustomed to.

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The Mercury retrograde through Aries, which is also coming to an end, has also helped to shed some light. You may have recognized yourself responding to situations in a way that disturbed you. “Is that really me?” Or you may have come to see how you walk with ease into every situation, ready to inspire. Whatever it is that’s come up, know that it’s all been to support your opportunity to begin again now, either with a new knowledge that can ignite a positive shift or with an acknowledgment of your latest growth spurt so that you can own your next level brilliance.

Let’s choose to change and become the new, better version of ourselves. Sometimes that means letting go of some old business, relationships, or thought patterns that have become so embedded, we just think they’re here to stay. But it can all blow away with the soft subtle wind of change. We are being shown where fear can nestle into our thoughts, causing us to hold tight to old ideas. But this new moon time can allow us to see them simply for what they are, words in our head. And if they aren’t being applied toward something purposeful, then they’re just loitering and need to go.

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Connect with those who remind you of your true nature.

So give over to your uniqueness. Become brave and take on optimistic beliefs. Choose to apply them toward your passions. There is no need to cling to the mantras in your head that have ultimately been sustaining your lack of forward movement or self-belief.

Connect with those who remind you of your true nature. Those that push you to expand the definition of you. Who recognize who you’ve been and love who you’re becoming. And more so, who know the person you’re capable of becoming in a way that you can’t even dream. Don’t let your personal growth be hindered by those who aren’t willing to see you for who you are now. And who you are ready to be.

Go slay the game. Collect all the coins. And remember that every day, that first breath you take is your Aries new moon. Every day is a fresh chance to choose your best adventure. Let the energy of now push you toward it.

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Mercury is in Retrograde and Blah Blah Blah

We are all being asked to see things and speak up in ways we haven’t felt compelled to before.

As Mercury retrogrades through Virgo, the sign of healing, of analysis and organization, we’re being called to revisit the areas in our lives, and in the world, that need this specific kind of paying attention to. Sure, retrograde gets a bad rep for breaking down computers and blah blah blah, but it’s really just a time when we should all be slowing down and taking the time to reflect. How did we get to this place? Where in our lives do we need to heal? What do we need to reorganize and reanalyze in our personal world in order to make it wiser, stronger? And how do we contribute to healing the wounds of America, and of this world?

The energies are high right now, but the window is open for growth and forward thinking change. We are all being asked to see things and speak up in ways we haven’t felt compelled to before. It may shift some of our core relationships in major ways, but again, it’s all meant for growth. It’s all meant for healing.

The shadow wants to take center stage and say here I am.

Deal with me. Heal with me.

Everything that’s coming to the surface for you right now, this week and next, is all about showing you how you ultimately want to plant your flag in this life. We got that eclipse coming, so the shadow wants to be seen. The shadow wants to take center stage and say here I am. Deal with me. Heal with me.

Don’t sleepwalk through this time. Pay attention. Take this as an opportunity to change the things that aren’t working, whether they are internal or external.

The goal is to cultivate pride in the person you are now and in the dreams you have for the person you want to be tomorrow. And if you’re not feeling proud of your beliefs, your relationships, your careers, your life, then analyze that. Figure out how to heal that. Make change around that. So that you can truly be proud in those moments when you are called to take a stand and say, “This is who I am as a person. This is what I believe in. This is what I am meant to do with my life.”

I got you. But we all got to have each other.

That Capricorn Full Moon When You Can’t Avoid The Change At Hand

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I recently had a dream where I was bitten by a bat. My hubby, the Aquarius, and I were sleeping and I noticed this little bat with bright red eyes perched in the corner of the room. He looked evil, intense, and I was sorta terrified. I knew I had to get it out of the house. But when I went to try and usher it out, it flew right at me and bit my hand. I could feel the pain of its bite, and there were two pinpricks of blood. It then landed on a wall nearby and just continued to stare at me, with those bright red eyes. I asked it, “Why did you do that?” It just glared. I woke up from the dream, and curiously still felt the numbness of its bite on my hand.

I thought about how the bat is a symbol of change and rebirth for me. It has shown up in various animal card readings, and it has appeared as a spirit animal when I have done some shamanic journeying work. So I figured its return had something to do with me needing to shift and evolve. Maybe I needed to do a new shamanic journey and reach out to it. However, I didn’t.

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Weeks later, I was hiking with a good friend and fellow Aries, who’s also a fantastic reservoir of spiritual connection for me. We had been talking about all things life and love, and I brought up the bat dream to her. “I’m thinking maybe it was about me really needing to focus on making some changes in myself. And that I need to take another shamanic journey.” Just then, my friend’s mouth dropped and her eyes told me to turn around. I did and saw a jeep with a large bat symbol on its hood. I mean, literally covering half of the hood. I turned back to my friend, who still had the same look on her face. We laughed. “I guess I do need to do those things, huh?”

Later that week, I went to my hubby’s shamanic journey circle and had a wonderful meet up with my bat guide. He told me that I needed to change, and then he killed me, which I guess is pretty common in these types of meditative experiences (if you haven’t journeyed, definitely check it out!) That death was symbolic of the transition I’m currently in, from the outdated version of me into a new, more focused me. And I believe it was setting me up for this current astrological landscape.

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Today marks the Capricorn Full Moon, and it’s a doozy. It’s going to be conjunct Pluto, which means both the moon and Pluto will be in the sign of Capricorn, conjoining and amplifying each other’s energies. And together, they will oppose the Sun and Mars, who are conjunct in Cancer. So what the hell does all that mean?

Basically, it’s time to see how bat, or your own inner guide, has been trying to speak to you and nurture you toward some kind of personal shift. Full moons are all about release, so there is some area in your life that is ready for a purging. And with that connection to Pluto, it’s in a big way. This is some “My soul needs this right now” business. And your heart needs it. You’ve either been in the throes of learning how to love yourself better or have been avoiding that process altogether. Either way, it is time to commit to loving you and paying attention to what you need. Your life is offering you signs to help mark the path, but are you paying attention?

Gone are the days of just standing back and waiting for permission to move forward or for someone to come along and hand the answer to you.

You are the answer.

The Mars/Sun component is also lending you a sense of urgency, like “I need to figure this out now.” And well, you do. Gone are the days of just standing back and waiting for permission to move forward or for someone to come along and hand the answer to you. You are the answer. Spirit is here to help in the form of meditations, dreams, and omens. So if you’ve ever dabbled in having a connection to spirit, now’s the time to commit, in whatever way works for you. Take you and the things that interest you much more seriously. No one else is going to do so until you do the same. And you deserve to feel purposeful with your life.

Jupiter is also finally moving forward, bringing some movement to areas of our lives that may have felt a little slow to get going. But don’t worry if things aren’t manifesting right away, even when you’re focusing your energy toward the things you’re supposed to be doing. As Lana Del Rey sings, “It’s enough just to make you go crazy.” And it is, but try to be like a Lana song and take it slow. Trust that the momentum is building because you are working toward building the thing that feels authentic to you.

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Most importantly, take care of yourself. We are in Cancer season, so you got to love you. You got to enjoy life and not beat yourself up for it. You got to feel all the feels and be okay with it. Take a bath. Enjoy a walk in nature near water. Play your favorite jams and sing along. Be a lady who lunches. Life is what you make it, so make it gorgeous and fun.

Remember, you create the shift and change in your life. Sometimes, you may need a bat to come along and bite you, just to stun you into seeing that you’re veering slightly off task. But the bat, or the change it represents, isn’t there to hurt you. Change is there to push you toward expansion and growth on some level. So utilize this full moon to help you release the deep emotional intensity that has been building up inside of you so that you can fully transform and move forward as your most full, inner-loving self.

That Mercury Retrograde When You Decided Not to Be a Hot Mess

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A Mercury retrograde time can bring chaos into one’s life, but it’s ultimately here to show you a different path to action

Today marks the start of another Mercury Retrograde period (until January 8th). Go ahead. Cheer now! What this means is that for the few next weeks, your greatest hot mess of a friend (and I’ve totally been him before) will be blaming it for every tardy meeting, every missed text, and every unreturned phone call. Sure, that technologically challenged shit will go down, especially for my Scorpio friends, but we can’t let what Mercury in retrograde traditionally represents rule all of our communication misgivings. In fact, we must take this time to hold up, slow our rolls, and take stock of the bigger picture we currently have for our lives. We must get real about whether everything we are doing is helping to manifest our greatest future goals.

Mercury is going retrograde in the sign of Capricorn, which is very concerned with the big picture for our lives and all the hard work that goes into achieving it. We all know that nothing is handed to us. Even for the overnight success, years were spent toiling away in the workshop, at a desk, in the studio, or at school. So when Mercury, the planet engaged in all things communication, halts itself for the retrograde, room should be made for a re-evaluation of one’s goals and what is being done to manifest them.

We should first narrow in on the specific area in life that keeps you up at night: career, a relationship, a health goal, or one’s view on spirituality. Then, if you’re hitting a wall of any kind, stop trying to PUSH forward and reconsider the path. Are you actually doing everything you could be doing to move ahead/break through or just going through some motions? Do you need to let go of something (a person, place, thing, or mentality) in a more profound way so that you can truly activate your next personal phase? The great thing is, you can stop looking around and blaming “xyz” for your problems. With some inward evaluation, you will see what is potentially keeping your goals at bay.

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Without a doubt, these next six weeks can be extremely transformative for all of us. With Pluto, the planet in charge of deep soul shifts, touching on this current Mercury phase, know that you’ll have a more focused understanding of your current intentions and goals by the end of January. But you have to be in the process of figuring your shit out. You can’t just get caught up in the day to day. This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t get a break in. In fact, you need one. I need one. I’ll be on a beach soon with a book in one hand and a cocktail in another. Yes, the start of this six-week process must include some legit down time. In numerology terms, we are at the end of a ‘9’ year, thus the ending of a major cycle. It’s a back to 1 moment. And with any conclusion to a great life period, we should get in a good ass nap. That’s part of the process too. But then, once revived, you must make time for a rethinking and reworking of those pieces in life that just aren’t taking shape.

It’s important to know that your problems aren’t all in your head and you aren’t the entire reason that you can’t see or think straight. The world is really fucked up right now. Cities are being ravaged without thought for humanity. Women’s rights are coming under fire in various U.S. states. LGBT individuals are continuing to feel like secondary humans to the rest of society. Governments are recalibrating to assert more power in the war for who has the biggest cock. And there is so much else with race and the environment and civil unrest and on and on. It’s disheartening and disillusioning and some of us are struggling to make sense of it – to find our footing.

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Take these next few weeks to better understand where in this world you want to make a difference

One only needs to look to these current times to see the lesson in this Mercury retrograde phase. Pause and reflect on the ways that you can be more of a citizen for the world you believe in. You must figure out how to take your personal unease and alchemize it into something of use. Perhaps you are already in that process. But don’t feel a complete loss if you’re feeling powerless. You’ve only just begun to understand your power and your community is just figuring out how to come together. So time will allow you to gather your resources and rally your ideas into fruition. Take these next few weeks to better understand where in the world you want to make a difference and how. A large part of that answer  will be found by getting a greater understanding of yourself.

A Mercury retrograde time can bring chaos into one’s life, but it’s ultimately here to show you a different path to action. Are you going to get swirled up into life’s drama or will you choose this time to react differently? Can you keep on playing the victim to external circumstances or take pause to consider healthy ways to be a worthy agent of change? Will you allow yourself a clear mind or one filled with to-do lists and regrets and worries? If that email won’t send or your phone won’t make outgoing calls, will you build yourself up into a frustrated mess or just put the damn thing down and try to enjoy a phone-free afternoon of relaxation and contemplation? Right now, I say go for the latter on all counts. Your life will ultimately be more in tune, you’ll feel more purposeful, and you won’t be someone else’s hot mess of a friend when the next retrograde rolls around in the Spring.

That Gemini Full Moon When You Got Out of Your Head And Into Your Life

 

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You are the Sun to your life, the greatest life-giving star to everything that creates your own personal Universe

I’ve recently come to the realization that I tend to put myself last, meaning that what I want always gets put behind what I believe other people want of me. I have trained myself to say, “Well let me handle what that other person needs from me since my thing can wait.” What that kind of thinking has fostered is a lifetime of waiting for myself to show up, well, for myself. I’ve constantly shown up for others out of fear of them hating me or being angry at me or not liking me. It’s all the business that comes along with wanting to be loved and accepted. But now, I’ve burst through to a place where I can see that I need to be the center of my world, and everyone else and their needs can orbit around me. Now this isn’t to say that I haven’t been selfish in the past. I have made choices where I had to put myself first. But in hindsight, those choices were made from a place of survival and not self-love. I wasn’t ever really running toward anything but more so running away. And this placed all of my dreams in a pile, one I would be back later to clean up. Thankfully, later is now. Better now than never.

The Gemini Full Moon time creates the space for us all to bring our inner hopes, needs, and questions to the surface so that we can take action on them. We have the opportunity to face whatever internal dialogue of self-doubt versus self-worth it is that we contend with and move through it. We can elevate ourselves from a one-dimensional to a multi-dimensional view of ourselves. We should take this time to grab those dreams, those visionary ideas for our lives that we haven’t given enough validity to and push them into some form of existence. This may be a necessary shift in a relationship or family, or perhaps a conversation that needs to happen around career. Maybe there’s a project that needs to begin or a new field of study that needs attention paid to. Whatever it is that you know in your heart and mind is the thing that will help you connect to your loved self, take some action toward it now.

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You must take stock of your life and see where your own inner conversation has led you. How are you keeping yourself small? Who have you been waiting for to give you permission that you can be who you want to be? You must move into a state of self-being and self-worth where you can feel enabled to accomplish the goals that you believe you could achieve once upon a dream. You have that opportunity. You just need to take responsibility for your growth and accept the abundance that is available to you. Sure, it may look like a terrible road to cross full of challenge and upheaval. But no great race was ever rewarded for not leaving the starting gate.

The key right now is to NOT go it alone. It’s so easy to stay inside the bubble of yourself and toil through your troubles there. You don’t want to seem weak to others. You don’t want friends to think you’re crazy or unhappy. You don’t want anyone to know you feel alone. But making yourself vulnerable to others is the fastest way to understand that you are not alone. And this Gemini Full Moon time wants you to connect with someone other than the critical voice in your head. Jupiter in Libra and Mars in Aquarius are around too, urging you to reach out and give yourself over to others, insecurities and all. Make yourself available to others. Ask for their insight. Gather advice on an issue. Allow their encouragement to enter into your being, to remind you that you are the Sun to your life, the greatest life-giving star to everything that creates your own personal Universe. So you deserve to do all that you feel encouraged and called to do. Yes, this process will make you feel like you have some growing up to do. But you do. We all do, no matter our age or experience. That is called living. So get to it. I’m here for you.

That Full Moon When You Got Real Clear

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We must be willing to dig into the truth of why we’re feeling so confused

Things just aren’t that clear right now. That’s what happens when Saturn, the planet of restriction and responsibility comes in close contact with Mercury, the ruler of the mind. Personally, I’ve been toiling over some decisions and driving myself to slightly epic points of insanity. Given that this is all occurring in Sagittarius means that it’s all trying to drive me toward a truth of some kind, but with Gemini in the mix, it’s hard to get quiet enough to clear the air. Whenever I sit with a client, I tend to always tell him or her that meditation is key to one’s success. And I always do my best to walk that talk and meditate daily. But even my recent meditations have been overrun with lists of things to do and questions about what’s right or wrong.

Today marks a Gemini full moon, which means it’s possible to connect to our minds in a way that helps us to release some answers to the questions on our thoughts. But we must be willing to dig into the truth of why we’re feeling so confused. Are we letting some fear or insecurity creep into the decision making process, clouding our best judgment and intuition? Or perhaps we’ve assigned some person in our life too much power over how we think or feel, causing our heart’s compass a lack of clarity. Whatever the case, we need to be willing to come to blows with our truest selves and face reality. We know what’s messing up. There just needs to be a willingness to accept what is a possibly a mistake we’ve made.

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This specific full moon time can feel challenging, but it can also be liberating

So how to know the truth? Well first off, trust your gut. You know your fears by now. You know what they sound like and you know what they respond to. If you’re not sure, then let me help. Your fears are usually excited by some need to be accepted by others. They can be enticed by the idea of being “left out” or considered a failure. They thrive on intimacy, and vulnerability. They don’t want you to succeed. Instead, they want you to stay put because it’s safe and free of change. So if you can’t get clear enough to make a strong decision, then take the time to dissect what is going on in your life and ask yourself if you’re being shrouded by some fear-based idea. Get calm and ask yourself what truly feels right and what feels wrong. You will know what makes sense for you. And let everyone else dictate their own lives, not yours.

It’s important to feel your thoughts and think about your feelings in a responsible way. Yes, these are two different things. Feel what you’re saying so that you know that you’re not saying something that can hurt another. If you’re thoughts are causing you pain and you can’t release them in a healthy way, they will only transform into hurtful words toward another. And this is never good, especially during the holidays when family is involved. Also, think about your feelings from an adult point of view. Are you overreacting? Are you being childish? Now is not the time to just react. Make sure your feelings about something or someone aren’t connected to some outdated pain or uncertainty. You may be bummed but it could just be about something that bears no resemblance to your actual reality. It’s just an old thinking pattern that feels ready to be released. So use this full moon time to release it in some constructive way, i.e. writing a letter you don’t need to send, some creative endeavor, or by simply beating a pillow for ten seconds. Um yeah, I do it. And it works.

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This specific full moon time can feel challenging, but it can also be liberating. It can be a time to release your old, “young” ways of thinking that don’t serve you anymore. You need to take responsibility for your thoughts and your feelings. No one is making you feel the way you do. You are simply choosing to respond. And you need to get a grip on how you do so. You deserve to feel good about your choices. You deserve to be confident. You have it within you. So have gratitude for your ability to change and grow, and have a fantastic Thanksgiving.

That Aries Full Moon When You Really Grew Up

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We have been motivated to leave behind old ways of being and to step into a more “grown-up” version of the person we want to be

I was talking to a friend last night, and we were discussing how both us and some of our friends are all feeling in a very similar place right now. It’s as if we’ve come through a larger cycle of transformation and change and we’re ready to “leave school for the real world.” In thinking about it, I realized that, collectively, we have done just that. For the last three years, Saturn has been moving through Scorpio. This three-year period has pushed us to face some of our weaknesses and our fears. It has asked us to move beyond our comfort zone and to try on new aspects of ourselves. We have been motivated to leave behind old ways of being and to step into a more “grown-up” version of the person we want to be. It has not been easy, and it may have left some of us in a place of “What the fuck do I do now?” But know that you’ve moved away from some relationships, work situations, home environments, etc, that just weren’t serving you. And as rough as it has been, it has also been rewarding. And you should feel much more in your power than the you who lived in your life three years ago.

Thankfully, the Aries Full Moon is here to help us culminate this process so that we can charge forth into the next horizon. It wants you to take your first major step into the newness of your current, more “grown-up” life. It’s time to take major advantage of the shift that your life has been creating for you. Take ownership of the positive changes you are instilling into your life. You know that leaving your job or committing to your new man was a challenge to undertake, but how strongly are you taking the reins in writing this next chapter? It’s time to seal the deal and just be the damn change already. Feel connected to your instincts and trust that inner voice to guide you properly. Whatever it is you’re trying to manifest, you have it in you to do so. You just have be the guide. No one else is gonna come along with a map and escort you to some gold. You are the map. Just be present enough to the flow of your life to follow it.

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I don’t need to take months to accomplish something when I have today

I know this to be true. Three years ago, I was in a job that felt meaningless to me. I knew it had to change but I didn’t know what the change was going to look like. As soon as I took ownership of the change that needed to occur, life took over. It wasn’t always easy but it was rewarding. And now I step into this next phase with that same sense of belief and excitement. But I also know that I can’t sleep on it. I don’t need to take months to accomplish something when I have today. I was lucky enough to jump into the moving waters before so that I could flow into profound opportunities and glorious personal growth experiences. But now, I must stay present so to navigate the rocks and waves ahead. I must stay present to my journey or else it will overcome me and I will be left, washed up on shore, waiting for another wave to catch me. I must stay present because there is no alternative. And you know this.

And now some further words on each sign:

Continue reading “That Aries Full Moon When You Really Grew Up”